This poem is written for all the people out there who don’t understand depression. The people who say weasly things like ‘Just think positive’!
Let me explain to you what depression feels like.
Depression is like a dull, rainy, Sunday afternoon downer every single day! Even when the sun is shining on the outside the inside is dark with chilling thoughts. You want to so desperately pull back the curtains to let the light in but your paralysed by the darkness.
Depression is like a horror movie on repeat. The murder scene, plays louder and louder and you can’t close your eyes and block your ears during the gruesome bits. because whether you’ve got your eyes open or closed your going to fully witness those torturing scenes over and over and over. Your heart beats faster, the screams get louder, with your head bent lower wishing for it all to stop. Your teacher asks you to ‘pay attention and stop being so rude.’
Depression is as uncomfortable as looking at a fat person wearing a jumper in the middle of summer outside in 30 degree heat. You just want to walk up to it and rip it off, but you cant escape the sweat beads dancing on your upper lip. They will keep producing themselves. The yearn to be cool and free in the breeze, but instead you are trapped under layers of mental abuse.
Depression is like the school bully living in your head. Telling you how much you suck, kicking you while your down and pissing in your school bag. Dad tells you: ‘you’ve got to keep fighting son’ but you know all your strength has been drained from this bully in your head.
Depression makes you a highly observational pessimist. It cuts you off from people, it separates your soul. You get a cuddle from someone and you can’t feel it like you used to. Your mum takes you to the beach to cheer you up. But you can’t connect to it’s beauty. Your mum points out dolphins playing in the waves, and you just wish you could feel as free as them.
People suffering depression are trapped by their thoughts. They are enslaved by the drama and catastrophes. In the prison walls of hell these people are merely trying to survive. So if they come off aloof or with attitude, give them a break. they are fighting an internal battle just to keep going.
Depression is not selfish. When he takes his own life, it’s because he watched that horror scene one too many times.He bled himself dry in mental hell.
It takes a lot of guts to end your life, can you imagine the pain you have to be in to end it?
To say goodbye to your pets, your family and all of earthly comforts.
If you can remember a couple of things not to do when helping loved ones with depression.
firstly: No lame comments like ‘You’ve just got to get over this’.
Secondly: No advice like ‘Take a walk and get some fresh air.’
Now a couple of things you can do that would be really beneficial.
Firstly: Provide unconditional love. Sitting with that person and giving them love, whether that be in the form of cuddles, telling them a funny joke or making a meal for them. Just give them love.
Secondly: A listening ear, don’t be afraid to hear what they say, and listen don’t listen to respond, just listen, sit with them in their pain, and let them offload. The curtains will open themselves. Not in your time. In their time.
I’m starting a support network for people who are suffering depression and / or anxiety. A place to come once a month and be educated on the amounts of support and help you can get for your depression and anxiety. A chance for alternative practioners to present to you new tools, and understanding for relief of depression and anxiety. If you would be interested in joining this group please email me your inquiry lucyellishypnotherapy@gmail.com
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